We're about to find out.
Next week, there will be an auction of the flotsam and jetsam of the fallen King of Pop's professional and personal life.
Items up for sale:
- Michael Jackson toe jam (from the Victory tour, complete with certificate of authenticity)
- Bubbles the Chimp's "My First Year" baby book
- A small vial containing Emmanuel Lewis's eyelash trimmings (don't ask)
- Tito Jackson (yes, the actual person)
- A sampler gift set of droppings from the Neverland Petting Zoo
- Used surgical masks
- A tube of mascara and a can of Aqua Net hair spray left by Liz Taylor during a 1985 sleepover
- The Elephant Man's dentist's right femur
- A pallet of unused Dippity-Do (to maintain your Jheri-curl)
- Brooke Shields' I.U.D. (still in wrapper)
The estimated price of these and all the other items up for sale at the auction is $87.42. Anything less than that indicates that this recession will last six more weeks, according to leading economists.